


The rules of etiquette apply not only to the wording of the invitation, but also to the addressing of envelopes. Many invitations come with two envelopes, both and inner and an outer. They may be addressed in your own handwriting, typically in either black or dark-blue ink, or you may have them addressed by a calligrapher. Whether you are using double envelopes or a single outer envelope, the following guidelines should be followed.
The outer envelope is the mailing envelope. The recipient's name and address appear on the face of the envelope, and are staggered or centered. The sender's address typically appears on the back flap of the envelope.
The inner envelope is addressed with only the recipient's surname, preceded by a title.
Abbreviations should not appear on the envelopes except in the case of a title. "Dr.," "Mr.," Mrs.," "Ms.," or "Jr." are acceptable.
The terms "and guest" and "and escort" should not be used on wedding envelopes. If you would like one of guests to bring a friend, ask for the friend's name and address and send him or her a separate invitation. (NOTE: Most modern couples find it perfectly acceptable to use the term "and guest" on their envelopes. If you have only an outer envelope, use "and guest." If you have both an inner and an outer envelope, address the outer envelope with the guests name and address (i.e. Mr. Thomas O'Neil) and address the inner envelope "Mr. O'Neil and Guest."
Likewise, "and family" should not appear on the envelopes. It is too impersonal and too ambiguous. Invitations that are extended to several members of the family should be addressed to the parents. The names of the children who are invited are written on the inner envelope beneath their parents' names. Older children living at home with their parents should receive separate invitations. (Note: Again, it is not unacceptable to use the term "and Family" on your envelopes. However, if you have both an outer and an inner envelope, do not use "and Family" on the outer envelope. Instead, include the names of the children underneath the parents name on the inner envelope. (See samples.)
| Married Couple |
| Outer Envelope: |
Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Mr. and Mrs. Friel |
Married Couple with Children Under
Eighteen Living at Home |
| Outer Envelope: |
Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Mr. and Mrs. Friel
Katherine and Thomas |
| Children Over Eighteen Living at Home |
| Outer Envelope: |
The Misses (or Messrs.) Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
The Misses (or Messrs.) Friel |
| Married Couple - Woman Kept Maiden Name |
| Outer Envelope: |
Ms. Nicole Levesque
Mr. Thomas Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Ms. Levesque
Mr. Friel |
| Married Couple - Both Are Doctors |
| Outer Envelope: |
The Doctors Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
The Doctors Friel |
| Married Couple - Woman Is a Doctor |
| Outer Envelope: |
Dr. Nicole Levesque
Mr. Thomas Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Dr. Levesque
Mr. Friel |
| Divorced Woman |
| Outer Envelope: |
Mrs. Nicole Levesque Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Mrs. Friel |
| Man and Woman Living Together |
| Outer Envelope: |
Ms. Nicole Levesque
Mr. Thomas Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Ms. Levesque
Mr. Friel |
| Single Man |
| Outer Envelope: |
Mr. Thomas Friel
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Mr. Friel |
| Single Woman |
| Outer Envelope: |
Miss (Ms.) Nicole Levesque
20 Laconia Circle
North Andover, Massachusetts 01845
|
| |
| Inner Envelope: |
Miss (Ms.) Levesque |
Steven L. Feinberg, Crane's Blue Book of Stationery (1989), pp. 141-148
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